latest search term mania

it should surprise nobody that my searches now have an even more phallic quality than of yore.

some of our new favourites are (yes) ‘donky cock’ (for sheer predictability) and the infinitesmally more creative tho equally badly spelled ‘donky + cock’ and the direct ‘there’s a great big penis up my butt’.

however, head, shoulders and rampant donkey danglers above the rest is the simultaneously comforting and enquiring ‘how does sweetmeal biscuit appeal to us’. if ever they discovered how web searches really work they would (to steal shamelessly from douglas adams) promptly disappear to be replaced by something even more inexplicable.

great big donkey cock

is my favourite piece of graffiti ever. i saw it 20-some years ago on the side of a bus shelter at four lane ends. it was accompanied by a diagram notable only for its anatomical inaccuracy.

it involved triangles. a faux-naif proto-banksy perhaps?

anyway that was just the usual laughable attempt to drive traffic towards double figures and amuse or embarass those kind or foolish enough to have bogrolled me. on a greener note it should provide some perv searches for me to blog about and help this to remain the sustainable source of low quality reading matter you both love – the online equivalent of recycled toilet paper. or at least that is my lofty aspiration. to that end, a minimum of 97% of the words you are reading have previously been used by me or someone else.

so if this post wasn’t about that, what is it about? (pauses and hopes to remember…)

it was in fact about a major moment of epiphany that came to me today – the latest step, if you will, on my zen road to enlightenment/endarkenment. i have learned that a household bin, fill it though you may with bleach, washing up liquid or other cleaning products will fail to do the decent thing and clean itself. only when the delicate alchemical balance is achieved between cleaning product and modicum of effort do you get a sparkly, clean-smelling bin.

glad you came? ah well.

maybe you are none the worse for the time spent here. and at least you have learned more about the great big donkey cock you sought.